With the NBA trade deadline coming up the rear, the American population is clearing the shelves at grocery stores and settling into their bomb shelters just in time to get hit with that nuclear sized Woj bomb everyone’s waiting for. Twitter is abuzz with speculation coming from every which way about the Brow & the Lakers. Good for them.
We’re here to better our city of Chicago, and just like Mr. Ed Burke – our campaign for the future starts today.
That is the campaign to bring Lonzo Ball and his Father to ChiTown.
Most reading this will think that Lavar ball is toxic. Well so is that diet coke you’re slugging down as you’re reading this. He may be toxic, but we all need a little toxicity in our lives. Here’s our point – is he as toxic as John Paxson and Gar Forman? Has Lavar ever choked out his son’s head coach? We need a man who’s going to tell GarPax to shut the fuck up – and Lavar is JUST the man for the job. Feathers need to be ruffled.
Lonzo would be a great young piece for the bulls. He’s already one of the most athletic PGs in the game, and arguably is up there as a top 10 passer in today’s NBA. With pieces like Lauri, Wendell, Lavine and (insert draft pick here), we need a player like Zo. Not a score-first PG, but a PG who will get the team involved. Who will run the offense through fluid play. A young guy who gels with a young team. Lonzo, Lavine,(Zion/RJ), Lauri, Wendell would have all the potential in the world.
And the added bonus: Lavar will buy beach front real estate inside of GarPax’s heads. Sign us up, Chicago.
Imagine some shit goes down like Zo gets benched for a game for something as dumb as not running Boylen’s sprints after a loss. Sad, but believable.
Now imagine Lavar calling into Stephen A Smith the next day ripping Garpax apart for allowing this to happen. Completely tearing Garpax down from their iron throne of lies they currently live on. Folks we live in the modern age of spin – and with the current conditions, this may be the only way to get out. The only way to get Garpax down from their untouchable spots. We need to will this into existence.
With that being said, we officially announce our campaign for the Ball family to save the Chicago Bulls Organization.
First beef is on us, Lavar.